Beano Comics; a retrospective.

Watch the video Here!

Down From The Attic EP. 15- Beano Comics

When we think of comics in modern times, it’s hard not to think of either Marvel or DC, after all both are at the height of their popularities right now due to in part to the cinematic universes both are building and establishing. With titles such as Iron Man, Captain America, Batman, Thor, The Flash to name but a few, you’d be forgiven for your mind immediately going to superheroes when you think the word comic. However, today I’m not going to be looking at either Marvel or DC, I’m looking at a different comic, one that’s older than Marvel and has been entertaining children and adults alike for nearly 80 years. It’s the anarchic, manic, wacky home of Dennis The Menace, Roger The Dodger, Minnie The Minx, The Bash Street Kids, Ivy The Terrible amongst dozens more. I’m talking of course about the iconic Beano comic. Lets start with a little history...

Writing this now, I find it difficult to imagine anyone in the UK who hasn’t at some point read a Beano comic as a child or at the very least knows of the comic. Unlike Marvel and DC where there is a constant narrative and continuity to the comics, where devotion and dedication to a series is all but demanded to follow and understand the story, The Beano focuses on short panel strips full of silly and riotous humour. There is no over arching story, no continuity, the comic regularly plays fast and loose with the rules. I’d argue that the only rule the Beano has is to make it’s readers laugh which it’s done successfully for the past 8 decades.

The Beano first was published on July 30th 1938 and came free with a Whoopee Mask to entice new readers, only one of these masks is known to still exist. The bright colourful cover was to draw the attention too as the inner pages were all black and white. Big Eggo the ostrich took centre stage with the front cover and Lord Snooty is on page 3, a character and comic strip who still endures to this day, we’ll come back to him later. The comic was wildly different than it’s modern iteration, sections of the comic are given over to illustrated adventure serials such as Morgan The Mighty and Cracker Jack. It’s handy to remember that at the time of publication, Disney Studios had only been operating for 15 years, along with Warner Bros establishing the cartoon industry within the cinemas and introducing scores of children to the idea of comic shorts. Similarly, adventure serials such as Tarzan and Zorro found all new popularity with advent of talking pictures in the 1920s. The Beano aped on the popularity of these with their own adventure serials too. As time passed and the comic evolved to more comedy focused, these adventure serials would be mostly dropped, however a few later inclusions remain such as General Jumbo and his robotic army and Billy The Cat, the closest Beano comes to having an actual super hero.

The Beano would carry on introducing new characters and continuing their serial story telling up until the advent of the second world war. The war affected the comic massively, within the first month of war due to paper rationing the comic was cut from 28 pages to 24 and free gifts to the readers dried up too. As the war progressed, pagination reduced the Beano to 22 pages, 20, by 1943 the Beano was a paltry 12 pages. Publications had too dropped from a weekly basis to every other week. This of course had a impact on which strips would make it into each issue. However, the comic endured through it’s tough times and it cannot be understated how much of a comfort and a distraction to the frightening and horrifying times that children across Britain were facing. The Beano openly ridiculed Adolf Hitler, Goering and Mussolini. The nazi regime is almost always portrayed as being utterly incompetent and it’s members being buffoons, I find it incredible to think how the Beano knew how influential it could be as propaganda tool to educate children on the political and social landscape of the time. Through these panels, children learnt the importance of blacking out all lights at night, air raid sirens, recycling everything who the REAL bad guys were in the world. 

When the war ended, the approach of the 1950s saw The Beano heading into it’s Golden Age, an era where a plethora of characters which still feature in the comic saw their first introductions. The 1950s really shaped the comic into the form we recognise it today. On 17th March 1951, The Beano’s most famous character joined the comic in a half page strip. The spiky haired, striped jumpered mischief maker, Dennis The Menace. In a staggering coincidence, a comic strip in U.S . also called Dennis The Menace launched on exactly the same day. 

Roger The Dodger in joined 1952, followed quickly by Minnie The Minx in 1953 and the Bash Street Kids in 1954. This gang of naughty kids provided the frame work for the comic, getting themselves into trouble and angering the adults of Beanotown for the delight of their readers. Characters would regularly get wolloped with slippers or caned by teachers, another sign of the times, and certain strips would have the characters destroying slippers and canes in an attempt to stop punishment. 

As time went on, more characters were introduced, The 1960s saw Billy Whizz, the world’s fastest boy join the ranks, Dennis also found Gnasher and the strip was renamed, Dennis The Menace and Gnasher. The 70s saw Dennis and Gnasher supplant Biffo The Bear as the cover star due to the duos massive popularity with readers. 

The editor took note and launched the Dennis the Menace Fan Club, where members would receive two badges and a wallet. These told the world that you were a true Beano Fan and the badges and wallet are highly collectable now. This club had membership in the millions including celebrities such as Linford Christie and Mark Hamill, that’s right, Luke Skywalker became a Phantom Menace… Readers would send in funny photos, jokes, even letters to certain characters with hopes they’d win the coveted Beano Fan tshirt. The Dennis The Menace Fan Club would eventually give way to the Beano Fan Club.

Moving into the 80s saw even more characters join the fold such as Smudge, a kid who loved being dirty, Ivy the Terrible and one of my all time favourites, Calamity James, the world’s unluckiest boy. The 80s also saw the introduction of the Beano Vs Dandy battle, a fun lighthearted war of sorts. Beano would regularly tease and insult Dandy readers and likewise the Dandy with the Beano. There’s even a strip where Beano characters go to Dandyland and vice versa. In truth, the battle was internal in the offices of Beano and Dandy, artists and writers were shared between the two comics and it became an internal completion of who had the better comic week to week, the prize being a Toby jug. Ultimately, The Beano ended up being the winner, with the Dandy sadly ceasing to be published in 2012 after 75 years. Thankfully a number of The Dandy’s more popular strips would find a new home in the pages of The Beano, such as Bananaman.

This brings us to my collection of comics, most of my comics are from the 90s and even in this period, I noticed gradual changes to the comics. The Beano has always continually changed and evolved to suit the readers interests and humour. As mentioned, new characters would be introduced and less popular characters would be retired, quite charmingly into Beanotown Retirement Castle. However, the introduction of new characters isn’t the only way that The Beano reinvents itself. The comic has always looked at the world and lampooned and joked about trends, celebrities and culture, ouch, take that Kylie! Rodger The Dodger play with Gameboys and Gamegears, Mini The Minx has a video game console and at one point Dennis had a tamagotchi.

Keeping a keen eye on trends and pop culture and lampooning it isn’t the only way that The Beano has strived to stay relevant to kids. Characters have have had massive overhauls to make them more appealing and relatable to modern audiences. Lord Snooty has lost his top hat, suit and dapper attire for a more contemporary look, more akin to Richie Rich. Whilst not agreeable to long devoted fans of the comic, Characters regularly get overhauled and if it keeps the characters funny and entertaining, who am I to judge? Because certain comic strips have been running for decades it’s inevitable that different artists would take the mantle of continuing them when the previous artists retires or passes on.

 I remember my first introduction to Dennis The Menace with him being a large, almost teenage looking boy, drawn by the talented David Sutherland. Then in the early 90s, Dennis shrank and became a much younger looking depiction. However, the trademark spiky hair and red and black jumper remained and his design has remained largely the same since. 

From 1952 to Present day

Dennis’ Dad (That’s his REAL name in the comic…no, seriously, it is) has had a massive redesign and one that I find one of the best. Old Dennis’ Dad used to wear a red pin strip suit, balding in appearance with a trim little mustache. Now, Dennis’ Dad wears a red polo shirt and has hair VERY similar to Dennis. The reasoning behind this? The Dennis I grew up with in the 80s and 90s has himself grown up and is now father to another Dennis, one that drives him just as wild as he did to his dad. I just love this, talk about Karmic retribution. 

Walter The Softy, Dennis’ main adversary has changed radically from being a wimpy, weedy, sissy boy to a more scheming, devious and villainous depticion. Gone are the days of Dennis simply bullying Walter and his group of Softies, now it’s more like a back and forth battle of getting back at each other for being mean and nasty to one another. This makes Dennis look less a bully and have more rationale for his actions, even if they are with water pistols, peashooters and catapults. 

Mentioning bullying, in 2009 controversy hit The Beano with a redesign of Dennis and Gnasher. This was to coincide with the new Dennis and Gnasher cartoon on the BBC but with political correctness on the agenda, Dennis was redesigned to have no weapons, Gnasher to never gnash posties and other people and the menacing to happen by accident and naivety rather than intentional. Fan reaction was generally negative to this, and the strip was tweaked so that Dennis would still use his weapons, but never against people. 

....urgh.

During the writing of this, news broke on the 8th October that Dennis was being redesigned again for a new BBC computer animated tv show. The catapult is gone, along with all his other weapons…replaced with…an iPad. Gnasher looks as those he’s had his teeth filed and Dennis forms a band with new friends. Walter the Softie… isn’t a softie any more. Inclusivity is the main focus of the show and admittedly, despite what I said early, I really don’t like this. Dennis is a Menace, not a rock band member, not a minor pest to his parents and neighbours, he’s a menace. I’m thankful I grew up on the era of him causing real trouble, getting grounded and punished for being an bad kid. I never went around smashing windows with a catapult or firing peas at people with a peashooter but it was funny to see and kids KNEW the consequences of doing this in real life, every strip he’d get in trouble. Modern day Dennis would be slapped with an ASBO, I know but a menace with an iPad? What’s he going to do? Send a bad tweet to Desperate Dan? Down vote a Dandy youtube video?

Aforementioned, my collection spans the 1990s and the earlier comics in my collection have a mix between black and white and full colour pages. On October 16th 1993 the comic went full colour, something that had only been reserved for the Summer Specials. I personally loved the old comics hand painted and hand drawn look, whereas modern issues are all digitally drawn and coloured.

Alongside the weekly comic, The Beano had summer specials, a staple of going on holiday was picking this up in the departure lounge, some of my issues here have stains from where sun tan lotion got on the comic whilst at the beach. 

Starting in 1983, The Beano Comic Library were small comic books that took a singular character or strip from the weekly comic and dedicated a full story to them. I absolutely loved these and they really allowed the writers to dive into the characters more and put them in scenarios and situations that wouldn’t be possible within the weekly comic. These were printed in a black and white and colour fashion, very similar to the printing methods of older Beano annuals. Full colour stories of a similar vein were found in the Beano Super Stars comic book series, again, allowing for wacky and fun stories for beloved characters all retaining the trademark humour.

Next year, The Beano celebrates it’s 80th anniversary, truly a landmark date for any comic. The Beano is special, it’s undeniably British in it’s humour and artwork, it’s themes and jokes. As much as it lampoons and apes popular culture in the comic the comic itself IS pop culture, even doctor who loves The Beano. 

Who loves The Beano?

It’s absurd look at British culture and life means it’ll always remain fresh, it’s legacy and long standing appeal means that it’ll continue on for many years to come. My Grandad read The Beano, as did my dad before me and to know that these characters are as much a part of their growing up as they were mine, it’s incredible to think about. There’s so much more I want to talk about regarding the Beano but this video is getting long enough as it is. Check back in the future where I’ll explore The Beano Annuals, Videos, games and collectables. 

Down From The Attic Ep.2 - Crossbows and Catapults

Down From The Attic Ep.2 - Crossbows and Catapults

Watch the video review here! https://youtu.be/ystpdRARiAE

There are so many board games that are, with no better way to put it, boring. Lengthy, complex rule books, game play that chugs along, long set up times, sometimes you want a little action. This week, we’re looking at Crossbows and Catapults Master Battle Set from 1992 made by Tomy. This game is anything but boring, this all out table top warfare!

The tatty, battered state of this box that my copy of this game tells you that this was well used and well loved. Look at that artwork on the box, hand painted, I love seeing dedication to a theme like this, the fact that a company would hire on a painter to create epic fantasy artwork… for a children’s board game. Of course the first thing that you notice is the two duelling warlords but look in the background, this poor fella is getting frazzled by this huge fireball! “ Discover an amazing world of warrior heroes, towering castles and brilliant all-action battles to play with your friends” The box proudly boasts “Over 100 pieces!” and they’re not kidding, flipping the box over shows you what you get inside, figures, flags, weapons, bricks, towers, and much more!. On the box is clearly shown the mechanics of the game, and the core game play concept.

Castles, towers, traps, crossbows, catapults, battling warriors, smashing stuff up, firing weapons, epic artwork, what kid would walk past this in the toy shop?! Well, admittedly, this one. To be fair, the game was positioned in the toy shop with the likes of HeroQuest and Dungeons and Dragons and I immediately wrote it off as one of those role playing games. It was my dad who pulled my over to it and said “hey, what about this?” “hmmm, yeah ok, that looks cool I guess”. I had no idea how incredibly fun this game was going to be. 

The instruction manual does a lot to introduce the two waring factions and the story leading up to the battle. You take control of either the Impalers of The Clannic Shelf, a barbarian-viking like army who live on a floating rock island above the world, who enjoy throwing their prisoners off the edge onto sharp objects or…unsuspecting passer by. The other faction are The Doomlords of Gulch, squat desert warriors from right under the Clannic Shelf, they’re shorter due to the extra gravitational force of the shelf weighing down on them. The Doomlords want to destroy the Clannic Shelf to enjoy normal gravity and normal seasons, The Impalers want to preserve their homeland. Tempers have reached boiling point, it’s time to wage WAR!

….but not before setting up the battlefield. I’m using the table here as the battlefield, as a kid I’d play this with my friends, my brother or my dad on the carpet and the projectiles would always get caught on the weave of the carpet, it’s far better to play on a smooth surface. On to the pieces! Each side gets a catapult tower, a castle keep, a siege catapult, a crossbow, 12 castle wall blocks, 8 figures, 5 flags, a tent and a ton of projectiles! 

The crossbow, catapult and catapult tower all require rubber bands for firing the projectiles, it’s a good idea to use short rubber bands or loop them up. On the back of the catapults are these notches that allow you to adjust how powerful the shot is, this is a pretty neat idea and helps a lot with fine tuning play to your style.

 However, the catapult tower requires two rubber bands, not just for the weapon, but for the trap. The platform on the top is spring loaded, a direct shot on the castle door will cause the platform to spring up, hurling the poor warrior on top in the air and down to his demise. 

The playing pieces allow you full reign to customise and change up your fortification layout, you can go for wide and expansive, small and compact, have your men upfront or to the back, build your walls tall or have them span your battlements, it’s entirely your choice, which just adds to the fun, no two battles will be alike. Being a wily veteran of this game, i’ve figured a few build styles and item positions that can help, but trick shots can always undo these.

Before starting the game, one of your warriors is selected to be leader and you place these 2 immortality discs underneath him. This effectively gives that figure 3 lives. It’s a good idea to position your leader in a place that’s not directly in the line of fire. I usually pop him behind the catapult tower. 

Who goes first is decided by the old “which hand is it in” game, and then, let the battle commence!

You take it turn by turn to fire at your opponent, each turn you can take two shots and you can choose to fire both shots from a single weapon or a mixture. The crossbow is by far and a way the most accurate and most powerful weapon in the game, when we play one of the house rules I implement is if you use both of your shots on the crossbow this turn, next turn you can’t use it. The catapult tower is pretty accurate, and can drop shot onto enemies pretty well. The small catapult is the wild card of the deck, its pretty powerful though can be difficult to aim and fire, it usually takes a few shots off it to get a feel for how strong a shot should be. 

The aim of the game is to kill all your opponents figures, you do this, you win the game. So, what’s to stop you from keeping all your figures hidden safely behind the catapult tower? Well, your weapons must have a figure within 4cm of them to fire, that’s where these battle rulers come into to play

 The exception to this rule is the catapult tower, a warrior must be stood on top of it in order to fire from it. You’ll need to think carefully about positioning your men, rotating the crossbow or catapult could interfere with them or push them away. So what happens if your warriors are too far away from your weapons? You can sacrifice a shot to move them up to 15 cm. Here’s where you can really be mean with your opponents, if they need to get a figure up to the catapult tower, is it 15cm as the crow flies or 15cm along the ground and up the tower? This really is down to your decision, and how well the battle is going for you.

You may have noticed all the flags around, they’re not just for decoration. Knocking down all five of them will allow you to bring a fallen warrior back to life. Not only that, but your opponent loses a turn. Knock down three flags in one turn (two shots) and you can bring two warriors back to life or take another two shots! The tent does much the same thing, knocking the roof off the tent brings a warrior back to life or gives the player another shot. 

Sometimes, bits of castle wall will fall in the way of weapons. Can you move them out the way? No chance! Your only options are to blast them out the way or sacrifice your whole turn by moving the weapon up to 15cm. I almost never move my weapons, the problem is that, fine, you can move your weapon out of debris but more often than not, where you move it to will be too far away from the warriors to operate it. You’d need to move a warrior to it sacrificing yet another shot and this just seems like a waste to me.

Standard projectiles are pretty destructive on their own but are you hankering for something a bit more devastating? This game has you covered! There are three special projectiles, rock, fire and oil. You only get one shot with these, so making them count is crucial. Unlike the standard projectiles, the special ones have a ring you overlay on the projectile once it has landed. Anything caught in the ring is destroyed. That’s right, with these you can destroy weapons, and there is no way of getting them back. The only weapon impervious to these attacks is the catapult tower, but it still kills the warrior stood on the top. Having one of these land on the crossbow is absolutely crushing, your best weapon is taken from you. The oil projectile works differently than the rock and fire, it’s designed to be used to with the fire projectile, it essentially extends the range the fire spreads. It’s a massive gamble and in the twenty plus years that i’ve played this game only once have I ever had the fire ring touch the oil ring. Of course, any warriors caught in the oil on it’s own will die but oil landing on weapons does nothing on it’s own. If it’s a full moon on a leap year and all the planets line up and you have your 4 leaf clover, lucky horse shoe and rabbit’s foot maybe….maybe you’ll get lucky with your shots. 

So your battle is going poorly, and you’re getting low on men and desperate for a solution. Fortunately, you have the opportunity to cast two spells during the course of the game. There are three magic spell cards, you select one at random, but hold this doesn’t necessarily mean things will improve things for you. Each spell card has a white spell…and a black spell, and you really really don’t want the black spell. So, how do you make sure you get the white spell? Same way you decided if who plays first, which hand is it in. It’s pure 50/50 chance. White spells give you the option of rebuilding your walls, moving weapons, bringing back multiple fallen warriors to life…..but  black spells can also destroy your crossbow, death of your warriors or even your leader, getting the guess right is crucial. 

As mentioned before, this is the Master Battle Set, but Tomy released a number of sets before and after this particular one. The line started in 1983, and the master battle set differed in that the catapult tower wasn’t part of the standard set, it was an add on you could buy. I’ve played this version, I picked up a copy years ago from a Blue Peter Bring and Buy sale (remember those?) but if completely honest, I can see why Tomy refined the Master Battle Set, the catapult tower really adds an element of danger and fun to the game, it’s like a bomb you know that’s going to go off at any moment. Released around 1984 was the Chariot Battle Set, the chariots were much like the crossbows in that you could fire from them. Additionally were the trojan horse battle set, battering ram set and battling giants set. These could be used in conjunction with the standard set to really build an enormous army, I can imagine games would last hours!

Released after Master Battle Set was the Dragon Battle Set and the Sea Battle Set. I had both of them, but unfortunately no longer own either. Both of them paled in comparison to the Master Battle Set. Put bluntly, the Sea Battle Set was terrible. Included were four ships, two for each army, that acted much like a crossbow….except that the projectile would invariably get stuck underneath and not fire out properly. There was a rule too regarding shields on the sides of the ship, they were just projectiles draped on little nubs and the slightest movement would send them falling off. I actually wrote to Tomy complaining about this as a kid, and surprisingly, they wrote back AND gave me a brand new set! That was unexpected of them and very decent of them, considering I was complaining about how poor one of their toys were. The Dragon Battle set wasn’t much better, the dragons acted like catapults except the projectiles would go anywhere but where you wanted them to, they’d also fall out of the dragon’s mouths before firing, they were incredibly irritating, awesome to look at, but that was about the strength of them. The fortifications were made of cardboard and compared with the plastic ones from the Master Battle Set, looked feeble and flimsy in comparison, a few good shots to them was enough to put creases and dents into them. Both of these sets now command an absurd amount of money on the second hand market. 

Nostalgia can quite easily play into how you perceive a game or how you review it but I can honestly say that this game is still absolutely amazing. I’ve introduced friends to this who have never even heard of it and they’ve said “woah, this is awesome!” Playing this now is just as much fun as it was when I bought it, games will generally last over an hour, and smashing up your friends castle and killing their soldiers just doesn’t get dull, it’s incredibly satisfying to land that one perfect shot on the castle door to send the spring loaded platform into action. This set is quite rare now, and commands a decent price with all it’s components. So, other than laying down some cash for a retro set, what can you do?

Well, the series was reworked again to Battleground in 2007, and these sets are plentiful. A lot of the original concepts remain with some interesting new weapons and scenery pieces too, there’s a number of expansion packs too to really make a massive battle! These are sets that I definitely intend to pick up in the future, but Crossbows and Catapults will always be special to me.

Watch my video review here! https://youtu.be/rG4JE2bXMq4

Welcome to Down From The Attic where I go up into my attic, rummage around and find something fun, interesting or cool to show you. 

The Incredible Crash Dummies were some of the best toys that I ever owned, hence why I held onto them. The line of toys were first introduced by Tyco in 1990, with the idea that it would help to promote road safety and encourage children to buckle their seat belts, and reading into this, the toys were launched with input from the America Nation Highway Traffic Safety Administration. I remember seeing adverts on the TV at the time with Slick and Spin driving wildly, eyes off the road, giving a thumbs up to the camera and saying “don’t be a dummy, buckle your seat belt!” “and leave the crashing to us”. Well, I might have buckled my seat belt, but I, and any fortunate kids who owned these fantastic toys, certainly didn’t leave the crashing to them…

It was my 6th birthday, and I remember going to the Toys R Us and picking out the crash cab the weekend before my birthday. The bright day glow orange box just leaped off the shelf and looking at the art work and pictures I was instantly entranced. “A car that you can smash up and put back together?!” My tiny mind was blown away by this. My birthday landed on a school day and I was so excited that to get home and get that thing out of the box that I made myself sick to get out of school, yes, Mrs McGrath if you’re watching, I did that on purpose.

The toys themselves are unlike any other I’ve seen, they’re designed to break, to fall apart and pop apart. Most of the figures have one or two buttons on their chests, the one button ones would have some comic effect, like Spare Tyre who’s eyes bug out of his head. The two button dummies, these were by far my favourite as pushing these two buttons would result in the limbs and head flying off. Inside the torso are two springs that hold clips in tension, and the pegs on the neck, shoulders and hips of the dummies appendages would click in. 

Unfortunately I no longer have the crash cab, but it was a recolour of one of the standard crash cars. These again were designed to break, the bonnet would crumple, the wheel pop off, the windshield flies out, the whole roof can come loose too! The interior of the car has some great play features too. As mentioned before, the all important seat belts. Unfortunately, 27 years hasn’t been kind on the rubber and these can get brittle. The fasteners can also get broken too being as thin as they are. Intact belts really do make a difference to crash, the dummies generally come out of the experience unscathed. A working airbag is included too though it is pot luck if it forces the steering wheel cap off. Being a passenger in this car would be awful as the passenger seat is spring loaded, that’s right, it throws the dummy right through the windshield! Put your dummies in the car, seatbelt on?….off, they’re dummies, they can handle it.

The beauty of these toys is that no two crashes are ever going to be alike, car parts and body parts are going to be thrown all over and to clean up, just click everything back in place and viola, good as new.

The Incredible crash dummies line didn’t just stop with the one car, they had a massive range of vehicles. My personal favourite was the F1 race car, like the crash cars the wheels would pop off but it was spring loaded to hinge in half, looking like it’s been bent, the steering wheel was also spring loaded to slam into the dummies chest buttons in an explosion of limbs and body parts, fantastic stuff!

The bike was also a favourite, the side car was assembled in a clam shell way and would detach from the bike at the point of impact. Spring loaded seats again would fling the driver from his perch, a lot of times leaving his arms holding onto the handle bars, I used to find this particularly amusing. 

Bull’s Truck has an interesting feature in that after travelling a certain distance or speed, the rear axel, which is again spring loaded, unlatches itself sending the car hurtling and tumbling through the air. 

The crash plane had a cargo bay in the bottom that could fit a dummy in, with a non working parachute pack, and you could drop them to their doom. When crashed, the engine retracts, the yolk stick crushes into the body buttons and the wings fall off. This toy definitely saw the most abuse as a kid, I know at least once I threw it out of my bedroom window to see it smash on the patio below. 

A few vehicles that came out that I have lost over the years or never owned were the crash lawmower, the engine would pop out and the seat spring forward, this was definitely one of my least used sets. The dune buggy didn’t have any real crash functions to it and to me, as a kid, that didn’t interest me. I wanted to see wheels and doors flying off everywhere! There was also the baby buggy which again didn’t have any crash features and was really the only way of getting the crash baby. I doubt now that this would be approved, a toy where you put a baby in car and crash it. There was also the damage dog and hub cat (got to love that pun), crash animals that would flatten when hit. The icing on the cake? Tire tread marks over the back. I miss the 90s….

In addition to the vehicles, there were a number of non vehicular sets that came out. The first was the crash test centre which I would’ve absolutely loved to have owned as a kid. It featured a wall that could be crashed through as well as a spring loaded seat that would slam the dummy against a number of interchangeable accessories. 

Junkman was the nemesis of the crash dummies and junkbot’s crash cannon was another set that I owned, pop a dummy in the cannon, angle the barrel, pull the string and….no, yank the string hard, there we go. This was another weak set in my mind, and I didn’t care too much for the Junkman and the Junkbots, they didn’t fall apart like dummies, they were good figures sure, really inventive and used great use of car parts to shape them but they felt counter productive to the whole dummy and crash idea. 

I can’t really mention the crash dummy line without mentioning the TV special. I did some research for this episode, and from what I can find, it’s one of the first full length 3D animated features. The short came free with a crash dummy figure, on a VHS tape and let me tell you, I wore that tape out the number of times I watched it. It blew my mind to see something like that back then and surprisingly it holds up fairly well. Sure you could cynically view it as one big long toy commercial but it’s still humorous and it’s worth checking out to see the infancy of 3D animation. It did a lot to introduce new characters and vehicles to the franchise and flesh out the personalities of the figures, which to be fair, all look alike facially and are pretty interchangeable. 

The toys are not without their faults. A common and disheartening fault was for these white plastic pegs that hold the limbs to the torso to break from….lets say, less then gentle play. When crashing is the name of the game, to have a figure break and not be repairable was so disappointing, you can use bluetak to hold it in place, but it’s not the same. Another thing is springs becoming misaligned in the vehicles and features not working like they should but these occurrences are rare and easily fixed. 

Put simply, these toys are….incredible. There’s really been nothing like them before or since and I hope one day that they get remade. Despite being 25 years old, they're still hardy toys, and work just as well as they did when new. The fact you’re getting a different crash each and every time keeps it and interesting, and above anything else fun. I’m 32 and I can say that I had fun playing with these again. They bring back memories of scuffing skirting boards my dad had just painted, sending a car careening down the stairs just to see what happens. Vintage ones such as these are getting pricier and pricier on the second hand market, especially with the boxes. If you have any still, dust them off and get them crashed.